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If your child will be the first in your family to go to college, your support matters more than your expertise. You don’t have to know how FAFSA works or what a "safety school" is — you have to be the steady presence who helps them keep going. Here’s how to be exactly that.
You don’t need to know the system to help
If you didn’t attend college here, you can still be your student’s biggest ally. Your job isn’t to have the answers — it’s to help them find the people who do: the school counselor, TRIO/Upward Bound, college-access nonprofits, and the financial aid office. Asking questions together is real support.
Protect their time to do this work
First-gen students often juggle jobs and family responsibilities. One of the most concrete things you can do is shield some hours for applications, FAFSA, and visits — and treat that work as important, not a distraction from helping at home.
Normalize asking for help
Many first-gen students feel they should figure everything out alone. Remind them that asking a professor, a counselor, or the first-gen office is exactly what successful students do — it’s a skill, not a weakness.
Point them to the programs built for this
First-gen students have dedicated support most families never hear about: TRIO and Upward Bound, the campus first-gen office, dedicated scholarships, and advisors whose whole job is helping students like yours. You and your student exploring these together is a powerful move.
First-gen students often carry guilt about leaving home, pressure to succeed for the whole family, or worry about the cost. Naming those feelings out loud — and reassuring them that wanting more is not betraying anyone — can matter as much as any logistics. Let them know that going to college and staying close to family are not opposites.
Keep going: see how parents can help, share the student’s first-generation starter path, and have the money conversation.